The Shaved-Head Athlete Index | Sportingnews
7 min read
A comprehensive collection of professional athletes who need to, have, and should never shave their heads.
In every athlete’s life, as with their career, there are key moments that define them.
The first time they play their sport.
The first time they win a championship.
Their first national team.
But there is one moment that many athletes face down, a turning point in their career, one that can change not only their performance but their legacy.
Some athletes embrace it, others run from it. Like championships, not every athlete gets the opportunity to face this, but for those that do, it is arguably one of the hardest decisions in their whole career.
When should they shave their head?
Do it too early, and you risk losing your youth, as well as the plethora of bald jokes that will be thrown your way.
Wait too long, and you fall victim to the dreaded combover, or people photoshopping the ‘crying MJ’ meme onto your bald spots.
It’s a precarious line to walk, and one that not all athletes have navigated successfully.
For this index, athletes will be grouped into three categories: overdue to shave, perfectly timed shave, and should never shave under any circumstances,
OVERDUE
We understand it’s difficult.
You never want to admit you’re losing hair, but for some athletes, shaving is the difference between looking like a stone-cold killer, and a middle-aged tax accountant.
Rafael Nadal
Rafael Nadal is one of the world’s best tennis players, with a resume that stacks up to practically anyone who has ever played the sport.
But while the Spaniard may be a whiz on the court, he is more than past due for a date with a head shaver, his formerly luscious locks reduced to mere wisps, leaving his scalp exposed under the sun during play.
No words necessary 😍@RafaelNadal • #AusOpen • #AO2022 pic.twitter.com/oRSFEV6uey
— #AusOpen (@AustralianOpen) January 17, 2022
What makes matters worse is his tendency to play wearing a headband, which acts to circle exactly where the issue is.
Rafa may be on his way to another Australian Open championship, but one of the opponents he will need to defeat is a buzzcut.
LeBron James
Saying LeBron has a questionable hairline is not groundbreaking by any stretch of the imagination, but hey, sometimes you need to play the classics.
Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, the history of the NBA is littered with all-time greats, who shaved their heads to become true killers.
And while LeBron has experimented with losing the locks, he has never been able to quite commit, and instead subjected himself to hairline jokes for much of his NBA career.
Ok so LeBron shaved his head
(Via his Instagram) pic.twitter.com/IfvSwRsVQE
— ghost paco (@AllaireMatt) June 15, 2017
But there’s still time to fix this. LeBron is on track to pass Kareem sometime next season as all-time leading point scorer, and what better fashion to do it in than rocking the shaved head that four of the top five have all sported.
Tiger Woods
Wearing a hat for almost his entire competitive career, Tiger is one that at times slips under the radar.
But father time is undefeated, and Tiger has been feeling his wrath in his follicles for a number of years now.
Tiger Woods taught us all an important lesson today. If you’re losing your hair just accept it. Don’t try to hang on to it for too long. Let it go. It’s gone. pic.twitter.com/hMS6ZdVUb1
— Justin Morsey (@CoachMorsey) April 15, 2019
Tiger is most definitely in the twilight of his career, but he is far from completely finished, and going out with a shaved head, whilst overdue, would definitely give him an increased ‘cool factor’ which feels like something he has been chasing during the latter stages of his career.
PERFECTLY TIMED
Some athletes know when it’s time.
Whether it be for performance, aesthetic, or a mix of the two, these are not athletes who shaved their heads, these are Shaved Head Athletes.
Kobe Bryant
Kobe is a prime example of an athlete making the right choice early on to shave his head.
Early on in his career, the Mamba sported a small afro, but in line with his killer mindset, Kobe decided that the hair had to go. One less thing to care about.
Which Kobe is your Favorite? 🐍🐐 pic.twitter.com/7pNuXpQNZj
— Mamba Insider (@Mamba_Insider) January 20, 2022
There are those that believe it was done in an effort to emulate MJ, others that think it was purely a fashion statement, but whatever the reasoning, Kobe’s choice to ditch the fro ensured not only that he grew his hard-edged mythos, but also avoided any late-career balding issues.
If anything, Kobe set the blueprint for modern Shaved Head Athletes.
Alex Volkanovski
One of the more recent additions to the index, Australia’s UFC champion was widely praised for his decision to fully shave, even receiving sign-off from Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson.
Volk made the call to shave his head in the lead-up to his fight against Brian Ortega, no doubt following the logic that less hair is less to fight, and it didn’t take long to be proven right, that slippery head able to slide out of two impossible-looking submissions.
No one remembers when we had hair, brother 🤣
Shave it off and keep kickin’ ass champ!! 🪒💪🏾 https://t.co/Lk6SYDN9TQ— Dwayne Johnson (@TheRock) September 22, 2021
Of course, Volkanovski is not the first fighter to shave his head, following the likes of Anderson Silva, Jon Jones, and Conor McGregor, but his choice to shave is the first to have such a direct cause and effect result during a fight.
This shaving is made all the more significant given the fact that the featherweight was still sporting a full head of hair prior to the shave.
Michael Klim
An Australian Olympic legend, Michael Klim represents a complete commitment to his craft.
While other swimmers merely wear swimming caps whilst in the pool, Klim opted for a more permanent solution, reducing his drag by simply removing it.
Before the Sydney Olympics, Team USA declared they would « smash the Aussies like guitars » in the 4 x 100m freestyle.
Michael Klim swam the first leg, broke the world record and set up Australia’s famous gold medal.
Happy birthday, legend. pic.twitter.com/zpbVdHFW3N
— bet365 AUS (@bet365_aus) August 13, 2019
Klim is not the only swimmer to opt for the hairless strategy, with others such as British breaststroke king Adam Peaty, but Klim is the standout, one shiny head standing out amongst the silicon clad crowd.
Usain Bolt
No list of bald-headed athletes would be complete without the world’s fastest man, Usain Bolt.
In general, sprinters are more common than other athletes to have shaved heads, which docks Bolt a few points, but there is no arguing that the sight of his bald head catching the stadium lights as he pulls ahead of his competition is not iconic.
The only reason Bolt loses points is because he does not fully commit to the shave, going back and forth throughout his various Olympics.
SHOULD NEVER SHAVE
Every good rule needs its exceptions, and this is no different.
For all the athletes that are in dire need of a haircut, there are those whose hair is so iconic, that to remove it may actually remove their ability in a Samson-esque way.
Will Pucovski
It takes a special kind of courage, nay honour, to sport a full-on mullet whilst representing your nation.
The second double ton of Will Pucovski’s career! #SheffieldShield pic.twitter.com/gseO2I221C
— cricket.com.au (@cricketcomau) November 1, 2020
But the rising cricket star was more than up to this challenge, keeping it business in the front and party in the back as he pulled on the baggy green in 2019.
Whilst his career since then has been fairly turbulent due to ongoing concussion issues, his hair has not been one of them, and shaving it now would rob the world of one of sports best hairdos.
Nic Naitanui
He may have Michael Jordan tattooed on his leg, but Naitanui should be doing everything possible to avoid the same shaved head as his sporting hero.
Nic Naitanui has become just the fourth Eagle in 35 years to claim back-to-back John Worsfold Medals 🏅
More: https://t.co/KDZbILByRF pic.twitter.com/RweWZkvJKp
— AFL (@AFL) September 15, 2021
Naitanui does not just have a good head of hair, he has an iconic one, his locs growing at almost at the same pace as his spectacular career.
People have even attempted to pull on his hair, but nothing has phased the West Coast star, and he should not even contemplate taking a razor to them.
Gardner Minshew
If we’re talking about people whose talent, whose very identity comes from their hair, then quarterback Gardner Minshew absolutely has to be on this list.
Jags fans: « wow, Trevor Lawrence has beautiful hair… »
Gardner Minshew: « hold my beer » pic.twitter.com/yVIVMDonTA
— Pick Six Podcast (@picksixpod) February 2, 2021
Minshew is the type of player who would consider shaving his head, but it is imperative that he does not, as his flowing locks have become a quintessential part of who he is as a player, and as a person.
